I had left work and ran to Fred's to get a
candle for my office. I left Fred’s, got
back on Industrial park road went past the doctor’s office looked up and it
happened; the crash. I can remember
the sound of the crashing glass tinkling all around me, the sounds of metal
crumpling. I can see my head, the tips of my hair going forward and being
sprung back. I can remember trying to brace myself and avoid everything on my
right side; Then the stop. It was as
if time stood still. I could see the smoke and dust that were engulfing me from
the front in beautiful swirling patterns.
Then I took that deep inhaling breath that seemed to re-inflate my lungs
and the overwhelming feeling of desire took over to get out. I remember trying to
reach for the door handle and feeling pain to pull it loose. I got my leg out
and looked down; my leg was crooked, bent out in an extreme way. My right arm
was caught by my shirt, clenched between some metal. I looked up and saw the driver
of the 18 wheeler coming toward me but stopping when he saw me. He lifted his
hands to his temples and sort of bobbed up and down in terror. I said “help
me”, he did nothing. He said awwwww I saw you coming, you never saw me I’m
sorry”. I was reaching for him, “help me please, I can’t get out”. He comes
over and pulls my shirt loose. I beg him please help me. He’s sort of dancing
in horror. “Help me please I need to get away”. “Please help me, please I can’t
sit down, my leg I think it’s broken” he comes over and I reach for him. He
tries helping me down but seems terrified to touch me. “I’m sorry” he says,
“You didn’t even look”. At this time it’s almost as if he’s blaming me, afraid
he’s going to get into trouble. I tell him I’m so sorry, ask is he okay. He
says “I’m ok; it’s about you, are you okay”. I ask him to call 911, can he
please get me some help, I ask him to call my husband, I need help. I’m half lying
on the ground on one side of my body. I can feel the shattered glass all over
my body and my supporting hand felt like I was crumbling up crackers, very hard
crackers. I remember sitting in the road being afraid someone would run over my
fingers. They didn’t seem to be stopping which reassured me I must be okay
right. I look up and see Angela. Oh my
God Parker, are you okay?” she looks incredibly flustered and flying about. The
next thing I know Amy is cradling me in her lap. “Breathe Parker”. I ask her Amy,
am I okay? I can see her looking around me sort of checking for holes. “You’re
okay Parker”. I asked her a few more times and she’s so soothing even when she’s
not really sure if I am anymore and her voice quivers. At this point I’m asking
everyone to call 911 and Anthony and to make sure he knows I’m okay so he won’t
drive fast because Bryant’s in the car with him. I can feel some pain but
mostly a shortness of breath. I was fighting to stay conscious and gasping for
a deeper breath. I wasn’t sure if I had been crushed but was so surprised to
see an ambulance. I see a man in a black
jacket and slacks with red hair and facial hair. He leans over my knee and
starts looking at me as to assess the damage. I joked “nice scrubs”. He
responded with a grin “you like those hu”.Out of the corner of my eye and see a
lady with pink capris on and remember thinking she’s so cold. I remember she
had sweetest look of concern on her face. Amy still cradling my broken body is
asking for a blanket for me. She brings one from her car or has Angela bring it
maybe. I don’t ever remember her leaving me. As soon as the lady in the pink puts down her
bag a man in a uniform comes in beside her moving her out of the way. The red
head updates him on my injuries. He tells me something and then starts cutting
off my clothes. I can feel the shattered glass on the road. The smell of
something is permeating the air. Smoke, antifreeze, I’m not sure but it’s very
strong. I’m afraid the truck will blow up. I’m apologizing to everyone for the
fuss and assuring them I’m okay. They’re reassuring me that no I’m really not okay. Then I see them
coming with the backboard. Getting me on the back board and strapping me in and
taping my head still caused two things. #1 the pain sets in and I can feel
every crack, scratch, glass spot & the hardness of the backboard and the agony
of the tape holding me down. I am completely out of any kind of control over my
own body. # 2 I realize the seriousness of what’s happened and that there’s a
very good chance my last view in this life may be the bright metallic glow of
the lights inside the ambulance. I look
over at the EMT and say I've really done it now haven’t I. He tells me I’m
lucky to be alive. He says when they rolled up to the scene he wasn't expecting
me to be alive. Tear one falls and I’m praying and thanking God for saving my
life. The ride in was very uncomfortable.
I joke with the EMT that my husband must be the one driving because only he
could hit every bump in the road. I can feel us stop a few times, red lights?
Me? I’m not sure. I was afraid I was going to roll right off that back board. I
didn't feel secure at all. I asked, he assured me I wasn't going anywhere. I
talk a lot when I’m nervous so I’m trying to engage him in conversation. My one sided conversation was falling on deaf
ears. He was very focused on running IV lines and filling out my chart. He was
very calm and reassuring. He was very skilled, both the EMT’s were. They seemed
to work in unison and took complete control of every inch of the situation that
was unfolding. From beginning to end they seemed to know exactly what to do and
when to do it. We pull into the ER and from here out things seem to be going by
in a blur. X-rays, CT scans, 4 doctors, numerous nurses and technicians. A few familiar faces that I was very happy see. The X-rays were the most painful of course.
Pulling and prodding my broken glass filled skin. The x-ray tech in training
had obviously not learned to control his expressions. He did great with the
elbow but the first x-ray of the knee & leg he turned pale and looked to
his trainer for guidance. I knew at this
point that something was horribly wrong. The room starts clearing and I finally
see my hero, my husband. The face representing the heart that allows me to be
weak. The tears are finally free to come down. They do, like the flood gates
have been opened to allow all my defenses to weaken and crumble into dust. I’m crying uncontrollably and we’re praying in
a groaning only the Lord can understand. In come the doctors trying to explain
to us what’s happened. I can’t focus. The crumbled glass is literally dripping
from my body onto the sheets & the floor. I can hear the doctor’s footsteps
and the crunching of the glass. He says I’ve crushed the top of my tibia; I
have a busted tibial plateau & broken elbow. My family starts coming in one at a time. All
causing a new eruption of tears. Each as I'm praying and thanking God that I get
to see them again. One more hug, one more kiss because I know I shouldn't be
here. I shouldn't be alive. The Lord has saved me for a reason. I am here for a
reason and I am loved. I get moved to a room. My room is on the gastroenterology
floor, there were none available on the orthopedic floor. This also ends up blessing me without measure.
The women that work this floor are incredible. I am so honored to have spent
this length of time with them. They were
warm, loving, and soothing. They made me feel as if I were a guest in their
home. They weren't my nurses, they were
my friends. We all became so close during my time there. I was able to learn so
much about them while I was there. Being a nurse may have been their profession
but they were so much more. They were missionaries, moms, artists and so much
more. They left a lasting impression in
my heart. I finally get to see photos of the truck. I had no idea it was that
bad. Everything on it is crushed, completely unrecognizable. The only spot on
the entire truck is what I've grown to refer to is my Jesus shaped bubble. It’s
large enough to fit only my body. There’s no logical explanation why this part
of the truck would remain untouched. This can only be described as a miracle
straight from God. He was in that truck with me, protecting me. Over the next few days I had many guests,
texts, phone calls & Facebook messages. They were all so heartwarming; each
came with a new eruption of tears. I
have to say going in to the ER that night I honestly believed had a funeral
been in order the room would be empty. By the time my last day there came I
felt a love I can’t explain. The only thing I can liken it to is the feeling
you have when you were saved. So much love welling up inside me longing to
erupt.
So to sum it up I am here for a reason. My
life and events leading up to this season were never by mistake. I believe in my
heart that the Father above has a plan for my life. I believe no longer that I’m
a mistake. I have been planted here for a reason. I wake up every morning
longing for Him to reveal to me His plan. Knowing this gets me through the next three to
six months I won’t be able to walk. Knowing this gives me the patience when I need
to write a letter with my left hand. Knowing this makes the promise of painful
arthritis in my right leg being inevitable okay. He is in charge of my life and
leading it. I am a child of the living God and he is still performing miracles today.
I am living proof that my Savior lives.
